Beating Depression in Six Simple Steps: Exercise

This is the third of my seven posts on beating depression without meds.  Share any one of my posts in this series on Pinterest or Facebook, and then let me know you've done so by commenting here on the blog.  Each share is worth one entry, so if you share each of the seven articles on both sites, you'll be entered fourteen times.  On November 8, I will draw the name of one lucky reader out of a hat for the grand prize: a NatureBright Sun Touch Plus therapy lamp!

You knew it was going to come up, right?  Because everyone from Dr. Phil to Dr. Who is recommending we exercise more.  Well, I'm sure you're not surprised that exercise is on the list of things that can prevent and even reverse depression.  I do have a surprise for you, though.  Just a little bit of exercise each week can make a huge difference here.  And that's good news for folks like me who would rather not exercise.  Ever.

It's an ongoing joke with all my siblings that we only run if we're being chased by a bear.  That's why I really really need this bumper sticker.

But even though I don't run, and I've never participated in organized sports, I do move my body voluntarily sometimes.  I love yoga.  I love biking.  I love hiking.  And those three things are enough to help me beat depression most of the time.  Just like my brother Spencer says,

  "Get your body moving, and your brain will catch up."

It's a little mind-blowing to imagine that pharmaceuticals costing our economy billions of dollars to design, produce and market can so easily be replaced and even surpassed.  But it's true: according to The Depression Cure and dozens of studies backing it up, moderate exercise just three times a week shows better results than anti-depressant medications.  Dr. Ilardi cites one such study of 156 depressed patients, all sadly out of shape, half of whom were prescribed exercise, and the other half Zoloft.  The exercise required was almost laughable: they took a brisk half-hour walk three times a week.  At first the treatments showed about equal amounts of improvement, but at about ten months, those who were exercising were "much more likely than those taking Zoloft to remain depression-free."  Dr. Ilardi continues:

Over a dozen clinical trials now show that exercise can effectively treat depression... [because] exercise actually changes the brain.  Like an antidepressant medication, it increases the activity of important brain chemicals like serotonin and dopamine.  It also stimulates the brain's release of a key growth hormone (BDNF), which in turn helps reverse the toxic, brain-damaging effects of depression.  It even sharpens memory and concentration, and helps us think more clearly.  Simply put, exercise is medicine--one that effects the brain more powerfully than any drug.

I can't tell you how happy I was to find that I could make a powerful impact on my mental health just by exercising an hour and a half a week.  I began to see that opportunities to squeeze in half-hour chunks of exercise were relatively easy to find.  Twice a week I hop on my bike for a half-hour spin, and once a week, I attend an hour-long yoga class--thus becoming an athletic overachiever by one half hour.  And for a certified couch potato, I have to say to my fellow loungers--I feel better physically, too.  My back and my tricky wrist don't hurt anymore, and I sleep better at night. Exercise is better for your mind and for your body--who knew, right?  :)

So I've convinced you it's worth a shot, yes?  Here are some basic steps for getting started:

• Choose an activity: your target heart rate should be between 60%-90% of the maximum heart rate for your age.  Check out an online chart if you want to be precise, but basically you want to be breathing a little harder and sweating--but not feeling like you want to die.  Which is why I don't run.  It should be something you already enjoy or something that sounds fun to you.  I also recommend it be something that won't require a total overhaul of your budget or finances--this way it'll be easy to start and stick to.  However, if a little money is required for the plan you really love, I encourage you to go for it.  After all, what wouldn't you give up to feel well again?  The sacrifice will pay off quickly and for a long time.  The bike TJ surprised me with almost ten years ago still blesses my life in a big way.
• Make a plan and get loved ones to help: ideally, you want to break up your ninety minutes of exercise throughout the week.  I like to bike early and late in the week, with my yoga class right in the middle. Get your family and friends on board here.  TJ knows how much better I feel when I go, so he totally supports me in this.  Even when I'm tempted to be lazy, he pushes me out the door.  But since he makes dinner on my yoga night, I am pretty motivated to get out of the way and let him do his thing.
• Make it fun: If you must run, at least do it with friends.  (Okay, last jab at runners, I promise. The truth is you make me feel super-insecure because you're awesome.)  But really, we all know that we're more likely to roll out of bed and head for the gym if we know someone we love is expecting us there.  Join forces.  It'll bless your life and theirs.  Also, it should go without saying that you shouldn't plan on an activity that bores you--but depression patients are gluttons for punishment and we often make plans that sound terrible even to us.  Think hard about what would fun for you and do that.  And don't forget that integrating a sense of purpose will make it more fun and fulfilling, too.  Gardening will give you sunshine and fresh air in the bargain, and you'll be crossing off stuff on your to-do list.

Friends, I hope you'll remember this little article when the going gets tough for you.  Exercise is often touted as a cure-all--and that's because it really is one--but don't let it become white noise for you. While it takes years for you to enjoy the fact that you're not dying of heart disease, exercising today will help you feel happier today.  Go out and try it, and take along someone you love.

This is the third of seven posts on beating depression without meds, based heavily on Stephen S. Ilardi's The Depression Cure: The 6-Step Program to Beating Depression Without Drugs.  I highly recommend you read the whole book to learn how best to implement this revolutionary treatment program.  Come back next week and learn how incorporating Omega-3s into your diet can help you win this battle.

And just so you know...I'm not getting anything from NatureBright or from the publishers of The Depression Cure.  I just get a kick out of helping others beat depression.  Somehow it makes what I go through worthwhile.  Almost.  :)

Beating Depression in Six Simple Steps: Light Therapy

This is the second of seven posts on beating depression without meds.  Share any one of my posts in this series on Pinterest or Facebook, and then let me know you've done so by commenting here on the blog.  Each share is worth one entry, so if you share each of the seven articles on both sites, you'll be entered fourteen times.  On November 8 I will draw the name of one lucky reader out of a hat for the grand prize: a NatureBright Sun Touch Plus therapy lamp!  

Who here remembers that '90s TV show, "Northern Exposure?"  Well, to be honest, I don't remember much of it either, because mom usually made us go to bed too early.  But the one episode I can recall centers on an Alaskan villager diagnosed with seasonal depression who is prescribed a light visor.  He goes around wearing it all the time and ends up so chipper that his friends decide he's overdosing--and they take it away.   My highly pragmatic mother (she of the early bedtimes) thought this was ludicrous.  "When was the last time you heard of someone getting too much sunshine," she asked.  "No way can you overdose on a light visor."  And as usual, mom was right.

Depression exists on a spectrum that ranges from the persistent (and sometimes even dangerous) symptoms of major depression, all the way down to the euphemistically labeled "winter blues," which about 20% of Americans report experiencing.  Wherever you or your loved one falls on this scale, the six steps Stephenen Ilardi outlines in The Depression Cure can improve matters.  We'll start with the light therapy, which consists of a vitamin D supplement as well as adequate exposure to bright light.

Why Light Therapy?
Light therapy is probably the most important element of our six steps to sufferers of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), because it goes to the heart of the problem: our brains and bodies need sunlight in order to function properly, and we don't get much of it in the winter.  Long story short: optical exposure to the kind of bright light produced on a cloudless, sunny day stimulates serotonin production, which increases feelings of well-being. Feeling better increases our likelihood of reaching out in social settings, which also increases feelings of well-being--and yes, social interaction is one of our six steps.  Light therapy also helps combat insomnia, a common symptom of SAD, and guess what--proper sleep is another of our six steps.  As you'll see in future posts, these steps are tightly interwoven so that they look less like steps and more like lifestyle.

A few years back, I had read The Depression Cure and was convinced that a light box would help me, but I just couldn't bring myself to pony up the $80 or more to get one.  After all, could it really make a big enough difference to justify the cost?  I dithered about it for a few months, and that's when my hero of a husband came in, surpising me with a NatureBright Sun Touch Plus for Christmas.

The effects were almost immediate, and honestly, they continue to be immediate.  The light box has become my first line of defense against depression, seasonal and otherwise.  Every time I feel myself sliding, I know I need to be more consistent about using it--and I always feel better within forty-eight hours of starting to use it again.

The light box is also phenomenal for sorting out circuaidian rhythms, which program our bodies to feel sleepy or awake at certain times.  Anytime I'm struggling with insomnia, or even when I want to start waking up earlier in the day--I start using the lamp first thing every morning.  I feel more awake all day; and then I sleep better at night, too.

Where Do I Start?
First you need to decide whether you even need a light box, because some people are able to get all the light they need just by being outside.  30 minutes of bright light is optimal, but keep in mind that we're talking about the bright light you get outside on a sunny, cloudless day.  The angle of the light is also important.  If you have ever visted St. George, Utah, you would say--with most of my family and friends--that I really shouldn't need a light box.  It never gets terribly cold, and it's sunny most days of the year.  But during the winter, taking time to be outside when the sun is high enough and bright enough can be a real challenge.  I love the convenience and consistency of the light box.

So assuming it's tough for you to get out in the winter, your first step is to get your hands on a good light box.  If you're still not convinced that it will help, see if you can borrow one.  And keep in mind that most sellers offer a money-back guarantee.  If you don't start feeling significantly better, you can always send it back.

Dr. Ilardi recommends a light box that emits at least 10,000 lux, positioned slightly above the head. Start with a half hour of exposure each morning, and then move down to fifteen minutes as you start feeling better.

During spells of terrible depression when even getting out of bed seems impossible, I put the light box right on the night stand.  Then all I have to do is turn it on and I'm on my way to feeling better. I'm doing pretty well mentally right now--so I have enough stamina to make it out of bed and all the way into the kitchen, where I have this setup:

(This is a great opportunity to get scripture study done first thing in the morning, too.) 

Also, don't forget your vitamin D supplement.  Depending on your doctor's recommendations, start at 2,000 IU of D3, and go up from there.

Christmas is Coming
Maybe you're just positive that a loved one needs one of these--and you're equally positive that they'll never buy it for themselves.  My dear friend's story is a lot like mine.  She wanted one, but her sick little mind told her that it might not be worth the expense.  A friend of hers heard about it, and soon a light box showed up on her doorstep.  She felt better within days.

I hope you will seriously consider finding a way to get this into the hands of someone who needs it, especially if you are that person. One lucky reader will win a free NatureBright light box just by sharing this post on social media!

This is the second of seven posts on beating depression without meds, based heavily on Stephen S. Ilardi's The Depression Cure: The 6-Step Program to Beating Depression Without Drugs.  I highly recommend you read the whole book to learn how best to implement this revolutionary treatment program.  Come back next week and learn how exercise out-performs anti-depressants. 

And just so you know...I'm not getting anything from NatureBright or from the publishers of The Depression Cure.  I just get a kick out of helping others beat depression.  Somehow it makes what I go through worthwhile.  Almost.  :)

Beat Depression in 6 Simple Steps...Without Medication

The geese and ducks are starting to go south, and if you battle seasonal depression like I do...so is everything else.  Actually, depression is a condition I manage on an ongoing basis--but winter makes it worse.  So every fall I gear up for the winter by reviewing my mental health checklist, and especially by turning on my light therapy lamp.

That's why I contacted NatureBright this week to see if they would donate a lamp for my giveaway.   I know it's a great product because I use it all the time.  And thanks to their generosity, I get to put one of these sweet babies in the hands of  a lucky reader--to use for herself or to give to someone she loves.

Lately I've been spending the first half of every day wanting to sleep, or cry, or both.  Whichever comes first, really.  And though it's a little early for SAD to kick in, it's not off the charts.  So as I am reviewing and re-implementing mental health basics that have saved me over and over again, I thought I'd share them with you.

So are we talking about the winter blues, seasonal depression, or major depressive disorder?  The answer is...yes!  They share the same causes, symptoms, and treatments, so--all of the above.  If you're reading this article in the middle of summer, don't throw the baby out with the bathwater.  The practices outlined here improve overall mental health, period--so whether you get slightly blue from time to time or whether you suffer constantly from the enormous weight of major depression, this post is for you.

I found these pearls in The Depression Cure: The 6-Step Program to Beat Depression Without Drugs, written by Stephen S. Ilardi.  If you've been to this blog with any regularity, you know that I want everyone in the world to read this book.  For those who haven't had the time to read it yet, and more importantly, for those of you who are in such tough shape you can't bring yourself to pick it up--and no judgement, because I've soooo been there--I've decided to spend the next six weeks discussing Ilardi's six steps to mental health.

The book is heavily based on research conducted on modern hunter-gatherer societies, noting a marked absence of symptoms indicating depression.  When we contrast the hardships suffered by these groups with the ease and prosperity enjoyed by the typical American, it is strange to report that Americans are the ones who suffer from depression!  These findings lead researchers to formulate a treatment plan based on the hunter-gatherer lifestyle including: dietary omega-3 fatty acids, engaging activity, physical exercise, social support, adequate sleep, and sunlight exposure.  For many people missing only one or two of these elements, addressing just those is enough to affect powerful and lasting change.  We'll spend time on each of these elements in coming weeks here on the blog.

But first, here's my caveat: anti-depressant medications are sometimes the very best first step on the road back to mental health.  They were life savers for me, and I've talked to many who have felt the same way.  If you've found medication that works for you, then there's really no reason to look elsewhere.  I am writing this post because many, like me, come to a point where the medication no longer works well enough to make them willing to put up with the side effects.  I will also say that the steps I will outline consistently out-perform medication in terms of resulting wellness.  But it takes practice and sometimes a little money to develop these life habits.  In the meantime, I am in full support of whatever you can do to feel well.  You deserve to be healthy.

This is the first of seven post on beating depression without meds.  Come back next week and learn how beneficial light therapy can be for depression, and especially for SAD.  And...don't forget to share!  

Share any one of my posts in this series on depression on Pinterest or Facebook, and then let me know you've done so by commenting here on the blog.  Each share is worth one entry, so if you share each of the seven articles on both sites, you'll be entered fourteen times.  

And just so you know...I'm not getting anything from NatureBright or from the publishers of The Depression Cure.  I just get a kick out helping others beat depression.  Somehow it makes what I go through worthwhile.  Almost.  :)

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Post edit:  The Sun Touch Lamp Giveaway concluded in the fall.  But feel free to share anyway.  :)

To the Healers

Ahem.  After that last post, I feel a little bit exposed, and feel the need to crack some jokes or maybe do a little soft-shoe.  But I know you're not here to read about some mythical perfect person, so again I say, thanks for reading, warts and all.

This week, I'm hugely relieved to say, has been progressively better.  Every day, the kids and I get more into our new routine and as stress levels go down, my mood improves.  But mostly I must give credit where it's due.  I know my loved ones have been praying for me, and my Father in Heaven has showered me with blessings.  So, status report on Woman of the House reads Normal this week. Hallelujah.

One of our family members (who shall remain nameless) required a trip to the E.R. last night, and there we stayed until 2 AM.  Flu-like symptoms were seeming less and less flu-like as the week wore on, and a chat with a our family nurse raised the specter of bleeding ulcers due to stress, diet, or (cue horrific music here) cancer.  I felt dangerously close to tears on the way to the hospital because of the C-word and a lifetime of premonitions that something like this would happen to me or someone I loved.

I'm happy to report that all these lugubrious possibilities were dispelled with a few simple--though tediously time-consuming--tests, and we were sent home with a prescription for nausea pills and a new perspective on life.  I'm also happy to report that at no point did I break down and cry.

We joked a lot about the dissimilarities between the ER of reality and that of the TV drama I used to love.  None of the doctors or nurses seemed unusually good-looking.  George Clooney was nowhere in sight.  And if he had been, I suspect he would have been bored.  There were no loud alarms indicating impending death, no paramedics bursting on the scene with gunshot victims, no heated arguments or passionate proposals between the staff.  And as our five hours there will attest, there was no sense of urgency, although once I did see a nurse running, and that made me feel better.

Still, it was real enough for me.  What is it about a trip to the Emergency Room that instantly snaps life into perspective?  I experienced such basic human desires and feelings while I was there.  Need. Helplessness.  Fear. Humility.  And above all, I felt a surge of gratitude toward the brave and patient men and women who work there, day in and day out.

Healers remind me of Jesus Christ.  They take all of humanity, regardless of virtue, status, and even ability to pay--take us at all hours of the day and night--see past our collective ugliness, addiction, and general pitiful state--and they do everything they can to help.  They dig deep, calling not only upon their knowledge and experience, but on their compassion, their humor, and their love.

I said thank you to each individual that took part in the parade through our hospital room last night, but I know that many healers work out of their homes or even just in their families.  If you are one of this noble race, I just want to say: you're amazing.  Thanks for being such an inspiration and a help. You truly make this world a better place.      

The Stewardship Project: Teaching Accountability through Family Chores

We have been getting lazy and crazy this summer.  Staying up late, eating breakfast at ten, going swimming when the kitchen is still dirty, and coming home just in time for a late afternoon nap and then dinner.  It's a good kind of crazy.

School starts next week though, and for home school moms and public school moms alike, it's time to get things back in order--right?  If you're like me, you're busy buying supplies, grabbing the best spots for music lessons, and coordinating rides.  While you get these things ready, I highly recommend getting your family ready for a smooth re-entry.

We're getting ready by rooting our kids out of bed a little earlier every day, and this year I've decided that I really can't start home school until we have chores back in place.  I've discovered by sad experience that throwing a new schedule at the kids all on one day usually results in huge melt-downs--and the kids are unhappy, too.  :)  So this year we're learning chores this week, the schedule next week, and the following week we'll actually add studying.  (Home school has its perks, eh?  I make my own rules.)

My kids know how to clean the kitchen, clean the bathroom, put away laundry, do basic lawn care, wash windows and even organize areas that are messy.  The only problem is...they don't know how to do any one of those those things extremely well.  Ahem.  I'm great at barking orders, keeping the family on a schedule, and getting the house in decent shape.  But I'm not good at follow-through with the kids.  My philosophy so far on kids and chores has been--and I think it's a good one--windows that are washed only somewhat well today by one of the kids are better than windows washed perfectly by me...someday.

We're ready to take it to the next level this year though, and I'm so excited.  This year I'm cutting down on what I ask of them, and requiring quality work.  So instead of asking for them to clean up after each other, I'm asking them to clean up after themselves.  Short term, I might be doing more of the chores around here, but long term I plan on them helping with more as they master the basics.

Stewardships
It's not all about re-branding dreary old "chores" into shiny new "stewardships"--although I am pretty proud of doing that.  I remember my parents re-branding stuff all the time.  We saw right through it all, of course, but semantics matter!  You can't resist the positive force of positive words!

The best part of this new system is that it teaches accountability, which admittedly has not been our strongest suit.  So here are the SHINY NEW STEWARDSHIPS.

Laundry:
In the past, every day a different kid would fold and put away laundry--any which way.  As long as it landed in a drawer, I didn't complain too loudly; and because I didn't know which child was responsible for my disaster of a linen closet, I really couldn't complain.  Now, I sort each child's clothing into his or her own basket, and they're in charge of putting it away.  Neatly.  And because they know no one else will be messing with their drawers, they are more motivated to keep them tidy. My awesome husband put extra shelves in the laundry room to make room for all the baskets.  So they get one stewardship point for an empty laundry basket, and another for neat drawers.

Bathroom:
The kids used to share a tube of toothpaste, and Ezra especially hated the mess everyone else made of it.  I remember growing up the oldest of eight, I would have killed for my own tube of toothpaste.  So I got a seperate one for each child and labeled it, as well as labeling an individual little box for it to go in.  Their floss and toothbrush also go in their little box.  So tidy!    They get one stewardship point for not leaving any belongings out in the bathroom, including clothes on the floor or stuff on the counter.

Belongings:
Each child is now responsible for putting away his or her belongings. Such a novel concept!  I check every room in the house, including their bedrooms, which should be tidy with beds made.  They get a point for a clean bedroom, and a point for not leaving belongings in any of the other rooms.

Morning Chores:
Ezra takes care of his lizards
Eliza wipes down the bathroom sink, counter and mirror
Naomi vacuums one room
Paul takes out the garbage
Isaiah wipes down the toilet seat
They get one point each.

Follow Through!
The best part of this deal is that I've planned a time for checking up.  This teaches accountability!  (For me, too.)  Every day after breakfast I walk through the house and make little tally marks for each point accumulated on my handy-dandy chart.  They can let these build up over the weeks for a big prize or (as has so far been the case) blow it all every day on a half-hour of iPad time.  Either way, everybody's happy.

Here is what they can buy with their stewardship points.

5 points   = 1/2 hour screen time

25 points = 1 candy bar

50 points = 1 late night with friends OR a date with Mom and Dad

The points are written in dry erase marker, so when they spend them, we just erase them.

There are a few really great principles at work here.  
#1:  kids will have privileges because we're nice parents.  We might as well make those privileges work for us.
#2:  mess begets mess.  Kids in the habit of leaving stuff lying around get used to living in messy spaces.  And a messy space makes us all more relaxed about making more messes.  Keeping things picked up in real time actually prevents other messes.
#3: kids who are asked to clean up a room other people have destroyed feel resentful, but when we honor and reward personal accountability, they are motivated to take care of their own things.

When I told TJ about this great new idea, he kind of laughed.  He said that it was actually a great idea, even though his initial reaction was, "Another brilliant plan to get the kids to do their chores?" And he's right.  I do come up with a new plan, complete with a spreadsheet and a fun visual tracker, every six months or so.  But I've come to believe that when it comes to family chores, novelty is my very best friend.  New plans don't mean that there was something wrong with the old ones--it just means they've served their purpose and it's time to move on.  So if now is the right moment for your family to move on, good luck!  And have fun designing the new spreadsheet.  It really is the best part!

Summer Book Reviews

It always makes me laugh when people say they don't have time to read.  It's like, "people!  What else is there?"  But I have to say that I'm a little sad about fall because I know I'll read a lot less than I have been lately.  I love summer reading! Here are my favs from this summer (A.K.A. the ones I can remember.)  Admittedly, none of these are really new titles, so you may have already read them.  But they were new to me, and I loved them!

Wonder
My new friend Rosie sent me this book as a gift for no good reason, and I can't remember the last time someone did that. I absolutely devoured it.  It is the story of a fifth-grade boy born with massive facial deformities.  He has never been to public school because he's always been recovering from surgeries, but his parents decide that the time has come.  As if middle school isn't hard enough! There are some heart-wrenching passages, but big payoffs throughout.  My favorite part of this book is the family of this boy.  You can tell they've allowed their trials to bring them closer together, and to fill them with compassion and love.  Everyone they meet is drawn into this family circle because of the love and peace they feel there.  This book is powerful, funny, and full of heart.

The Ties That Bind
My sister introduced me to this author when she recommended Desperate Measures as a book whose heroine understands the difference between feminism and happiness.  I loved it, and quickly moved on to this one, which turns out to be my favorite of the two.  This is the story of a young man about to become a father.  Because his father walked out on him, he has serious doubts about his own ability to be a good dad, and his wife encourages him to track his dad down and talk to him.  This leads him on a quest that helps him understand not only his father, but those who came before him.  I'm doing a terrible job describing it, but this is really a great book.  It's a book about family history that is not at all corny or didactic.  Wait, am I making it worse?  Just trust me and go read it.

               

Dressing Your Truth/The Child Whisperer
These are two books that I have held off reading forever for the basic fact that this woman's making a lot of money right now, and that makes me instantly suspicious.  Having said that, I now have to concede that she's pretty brilliant.  Both of these books are based on her energy profiling system, which delineates four basic types of person.  The term, "energy profiling" makes me suspicious, too, and if you feel the same you can comfort yourself that it's just another personality test.  Personality tests are always fun; remember the Color Code?

Anyway, Dressing Your Truth's basic premise is that if you dress like the kind of person you are, people won't be surprised when you act the way you are.  It talks a lot about how we all have closets full of clothing we really don't like, because we're stuck trying to follow fashions or even bad advice. This book has made shopping for and wearing clothes a lot more fun for me.  I feel more at home in what I wear, and I now know why I hate some of the clothes that are perfectly good.  She doesn't go a lot into details, I have to say.  You're supposed to get online, give her a bunch of money, and then learn all she has to say.  But you can pick up enough from the book, YouTube and Pinterest to get the hang of it.  Psst: it's free on Amazon and it's a great crash course on the whole energy profiling system, so go for it!

The Child Whisperer is the most insightful parenting book I've ever read, hands down.  It's more like a reference book, really, so don't try to down the whole thing in one weekend.  I skipped straight to the chapters describing the different types, and had so much fun profiling my kids.  She gives great practical advice for each type on how to handle school, recreation, chores, church, discipline, and communication.  It's amazing how easy this book makes it to pinpoint things that work and do not work for each child.  I felt like she had already met each one of them.  This one's free to borrow if you're an Amazon Prime member.

Eliza
I always try to read something about the pioneers in the month of July--ever since last year, that is. It's part of my ongoing effort to prove to myself and the world that I can, indeed, read non-fiction. This year I chose to learn about this amazing lady, and I'm so glad I did.  This book reads--may I say?--almost like a novel, it's so good.  I can't believe how little I knew about her before especially since my oldest daughter is named after her.  For instance, did you know Eliza R. Snow was a plural wife both to Joseph Smith and to Brigham Young?  Did you know she gave her substantial dowry to support the church, reducing reducing her to a boarder in the homes of other families for many years of her life?  Did you know that she was hailed as "Zion's Poetess" but that she was so good she really could have made a name for herself no matter what subject matter she chose?  I love how heavily this book focuses on her literary career.  She wrote with passion, with humor, and with great skill--and she consecrated her whole life to building the kingdom of God on the earth.  She is a true kindred spirit to Relief Society sisters the world over.  This one's a must-read.

Well, let me know if you read one or all of these; I'd love to hear your thoughts!  Also, what books are you dying for the whole world to read?  I need to start my fall line-up!

Explosion of Awesomeness

Recently our ward had a special third-hour lesson on Sabbath-Day worship, which takes on a whole new significance when you hear someone label it a "prophetic priority."  One of the things I loved most about this meeting (besides the fact that they made it possible for Primary teachers to attend--woot!) was its emphasis on what Elder Bednar calls "multi-generational families."  He taught that strong multi-generational families are the Lord's best tool for bringing each one of us back to him.

I may or may not have heard choirs of angels singing when I heard this teaching, because our family is just starting to qualify as a strong multi-generational family.  Mom and Dad were both converts, and they raised their kids in the church without the blessings of a faithful extended family.  Luckily for us, our extended family is strong and full of love.  We have so many wonderful memories of our grandparents especially, and I love that my kids are growing up knowing them well.  But we kids are basically second-generation Mormons, and so what has happened in the past ten years has taken us by surprise.

Dozens of cousins.

Here's the original group of Mom, Dad, and the sibs:

And here we are with spouses and children:

So maybe we're not quite up to dozens yet, but another five or ten years ought to do the trick.  And honestly, we knew that our numbers would kind of explode.  But I don't think we were prepared for the explosion of awesomeness. (I know.  Sheer poetry.  Ha, ha!)

My siblings have each and every one of us married up, which means our family has gotten stronger and stronger each time there has been a wedding.  And watching my kids grow up with cousins as best friends has been one of the greatest joys of my life.  But the very best part of being a member of this family is the joy we have when we get together.

Recently this handsome guy, who is second to youngest of the siblings, left on a mission to McAllen, Texas.  In light of the fact that Taylor's pretty much the coolest person in the world, we spent his last two weeks here in pretty much a non-stop sibling party.  It was a Taylor-paloozah.  We swam, we ate, we drank, we played, we laughed and we cried.  We all attended his farewell, which is big, since Nikki and her baby came from California and Kendall came from D.C.  Then we drove up in caravan to see him off to the MTC in Provo.  

This is different for us Monnetts.  We've never seen the kind of joy that happens when uncles and aunts, parents, cousins, siblings, and children get together after long absences.  When we were kids, we celebrated ordinances, holidays and milestones in a smaller way.  But now the faith that we celebrate is confirmed by the very showing of loved ones--as if the Lord is giving us a taste of what we are striving for, just in the happiness we have together.  When I'm with my siblings, I feel that all is right in the world.  

I don't know for sure, because we're still early in this experiment.  But I can already see hints of the good our extended family does for my kids in their daily lives.  Living gospel principles is not theoretical for them, because they are watching older cousins, aunts and uncles do it, through thick and through thin.  They know that there are a whole ton of people who love them for who they are. And they know they're never alone.  This is powerful.  I know that they're being strengthened for whatever trials are ahead.  They will stand strong because they are accountable to so many people who love them.  

Okay.  Sermon over.  Here are the rest of the pictures.  I love my family!