Sunday, April 19, 2015

My Secret Weapon

I feel certain that if, in our homes, parents will read from the Book of Mormon prayerfully and regularly, both by themselves and with their children, the spirit of that great book will come to permeate our homes and all who dwell therein.  The spirit of reverence will increase; mutual respect and consideration for each other will grow.  The spirit of contention will depart.  Parents will counsel their children in greater love and wisdom.  Children will be more responsive and submissive to the counsel of their parents.  Righteousness will increase.  Faith, hope, and charity--the pure love of Christ--will abound in our homes and lives, bringing in their wake peace, joy, and happiness.
-Marion G. Romney 
I have read this promise so many times that I'm surprised I don't know it by heart.  We've always been pretty consistent in our scripture study, and so I've always been a little bugged that we don't have the rosy family scene this quote depicts.  I've especially wondered why, when we're doing the best we can to live the gospel, we struggle in this house with so much contention.  And as I've prayed for help in teaching this family to speak kindly, I've been prompted to be more consistent in our family scripture study.  This advice I always acted gladly upon...for a few days.  :)

The answer to my prayers came this year in the form of a challenge from the bishop: to read the Book of Mormon in its entirety as a family this year.  He gave us a schedule that started Jan 1 2015, and my family scrambled to finish our first reading before the end of last year so we could start on time.

It took us at least four years to read the Book of Mormon as a family last time.  Suffice it to say, it scared me a little to think of committing to read the whole thing in one year.

My husband, who teaches seminary, was not crazy about the schedule idea.  He's a free spirit, and doesn't like the idea of rushing through great material in order to complete an assignment.  And to be honest, I had my doubts about the program, too.  But we believe in following our priesthood leaders, and so we sucked it up and started marking boxes every day to keep track of our progress.

We read together in the mornings.  Sometimes we're tempted to do other things first-- especially on the weekends when we have tons of time at home--but we've found that our chances of success go way down if we don't do it before breakfast.  And since we know we have to make up any days we miss, we are highly motivated not to miss.  We wake up the late sleepers and drag them in, blankets and all, and read our daily assignment from the bishop, which is usually around eighteen verses.  Part of the reading assignment is to mark, in different colors of pencil, attributes of Christ, references to Christ, and the words of Christ.  Our oldest three are all strong readers, so they take turns doing this. Sometimes we have great discussions on gospel principles.  Sometimes we laugh at the foibles of characters such as Laman (whiny), Chemish (lazy), or King Noah (selfish.)  Sometimes we kind of rush through the daily assignment and hope something sank in on its own.

TJ and I have been pretty consistent with family scripture study for the past several years.  We've done really well on weekdays and have missed a lot of weekends.  Sometimes, weekday study has been just a few minutes long, but we figured it was better than nothing.

But I can tell you now that in scripture study (as in life), you really do get out of it only as much as you put into it.  The difference between being pretty consistent and being very consistent is the difference between being pretty blessed and being very blessed.

We are feeling very blessed.  The kids are happier.  TJ and I are more patient.  We approach challenges with greater faith and softer words.  We seem to find more teaching moments throughout the day to witness of gospel principles to our kids.  There are way fewer--WAY fewer--fights over toys, clothes, and the breathing of someone else's air.  There is a culture of service going on, and an overall spirit of forgiveness.  Most of all, there's more love around here.

Isaiah and Paul, who are three and five respectively, are the best barometers for the success of this family.  When we struggle, they tend to act out.  But when this family's humming the way it hums right now, they are absolute joys to be with.  They tell me, each other, and the other kids several times a day how much they love us.  They smile.  They kiss.  They basically love on the family as a whole.  And I really think it's because they've been sitting in on our daily sessions with the Book of Mormon.  How much they can grasp cognitively, I really don't know.  But something is going on in their hearts, and besides being extremely cute, it is catching.

Our family is now perfect and we'll probably all be translated sometime this week.  JUST KIDDING! We still have challenges.  We still lose our cool now and then.  We still get lazy, disrespectful, unkind, you name it.  But it's just easier to be good these days.  And I know I can use all the help I can get.

I've started thinking that the Book of Mormon is every Mormon mom's secret weapon.  Sometimes it is even a secret from us.  We forget, don't we, all the promises that have been made?  We forget how good we felt when we were consistently studying as a family.  Even while we're listing the reasons we're not doing it--the list is long and we've all got one--we know in our hearts that if we could straighten out our priorities a little we'd be happier.  More blessed.

Sister Linda S. Reeves shared a testimony that has stuck with me:

A friend recently cautioned, “When you ask the sisters to read the scriptures and pray more, it stresses them out. They already feel like they have too much to do.”
Brothers and sisters, because I know from my own experiences, and those of my husband, I must testify of the blessings of daily scripture study and prayer and weekly family home evening. These are the very practices that help take away stress, give direction to our lives, and add protection to our homes. Then, if pornography or other challenges do strike our families, we can petition the Lord for help and expect great guidance from the Spirit, knowing that we have done what our Father has asked us to do.
Brothers and sisters, if these have not been practices in our homes, we can all begin now. If our children are older and refuse to join us, we can start with ourselves. As we do, the influence of the Spirit will begin to fill our homes and our lives and, over time, children may respond.  (emphasis added)

I love this counsel.  As moms, we are all looking to lighten the load of stress and worry we feel every day.  Do you remember the moment she made this monumental promise?  I do!  It just makes sense that the Father of us all, who cares deeply about my work as a mother, would have put in place practices that would empower and bless me.  It is almost silly for me to be writing this post.  Silly that this is such a revelation to me--because so many have testified of the power of daily scripture study.  But I'm here to add my voice.  It works.  

3 comments:

T.J. said...

Amen! The Book of Mormon especially works because it is centered on Christ and coming to him!

Jen and Scott said...

Thank you for the awesome post! I too have wondered about the promise given when we are mostly consistent with our scripture study, and we still have a lot of contention. You have inspired me to double our efforts and do better. Especially on the weekends! :)

Karen Dick said...

Thanks for reading, Jen! And good luck with those weekends! :)